Cable's pretty good when you're sick. I watched the end of a Mad Max movie last night, the one with Tina Turner in it. There's a part where they rescue a pig keeping dwarf from Tina, and they run away, then get on a plane. As the plane is taking off, and Max is left stranded, the dwarf salutes - and he looks just like John Howard.

(excerpted from old journal)

(...) Apparently he had a migraine the other day though, and hasn't felt right since. So I said "Maybe it was a stroke?" in my best helpful voice.

This chick in the store let her co-worker know that I buy Consolidated - but I'm not a lesbian. She knows that because a few months ago she asked 'Are you a lesbian?' and I said 'No.'

I'm going to talk about my cat now, dammit. Why can't he figure how to get in the house? He gets out. I thought it was because he's too fat to jump back up to the window, but now I'm leaning towards too stupid. He's more likely to answer to 'you stupid fat cat' (or 'fatty') than his name now.  read more »

I get a lift to the station from my boyfriend in the mornings. The conversation as I got out today was:

Boyfriend: Have a good day.
Lynne: Yeah well, end of month. You know.
Boyfriend: Umm, okay. Have a not too bad day?
Lynne: I think the phrase you're looking for is "Try not to kill anyone."

Something that's fascinating me (shitting me) lately at work, is the lack of basic kitchen stuff. We're an international company, worth stunning amounts of money and all - but we have no tea towels, and three teaspoons. One teaspoon is always buried at the bottom of the coffee container, the other two are dirty. And we always run out of actual milk. I can't handle simulated milk. Notice how it doesn't say 'Milk' on the carton? That would be because it's not.  read more »

I experienced one of my classic drunkeness giveaways today. I went to the toilet (which went fine) - and it took me a minute or so to work out how to unlock the door and leave. It's not a confusing or panicked trapped in the toilet thing. I just find sometimes I stare at the door blankly for a while before my brain cooperates and reminds me what to do.

(excerpted from old journal)